National Children of Foster Carers Month - Amy's family

October is national Children of Foster Carers Month. Celebrating the birth children growing up with foster children, and their positive impact.

Amy, from mid Essex grew up in a fostering family, and started fostering with Essex herself.

Amy is inspiring families to start fostering while their children are living at home too.

"My parents fostered children with additional needs when their families needed a break," explains Amy

This is a type of fostering called respite fostering. Respite foster carers help other foster carers and birth families care for children. It's a part-time fostering role and you can become a respite foster carer, from one weekend a month.

"Our home would be full of children, including me and my twin sister. When we left home for university, our parents began fostering full time."

Amy and her husband are fostering, alongside their own two daughters

"I became a foster carer at 25, before my husband Sam and I got married and started our own family. Now, we've been fostering for 13 years, and we've fostered around 12 children.

Usually, people foster when they're older and their children have left home. But we wanted to do it the other way round, I was keen to get started straight away."

Amy and Sam now have two birth daughters, Lily (aged 9) and Maggie (aged 5). Amy explains, as her daughters were born into a fostering family, they don’t know any different. They have a strong bond with the foster children at home.

Recently, we recently welcomed babies, one who was just two days old, and they were with us for 18 months. My daughters loved helping to look after them, loving them unconditionally.”

At 27, Amy and Sam fostered three sisters together, Katherine, Maisie and Eleanor

“Now the girls have left home and they're all doing so well. Katherine lives in her own flat and still comes home for family dinners. Maisie is a senior cabin crew and owns her own home at age 24. Eleanor has graduated with a first-class degree in Anthropology from Exeter University."

Now aged 28 herself, Katherine shares how close she is with Amy and Sam too.

"Amy came into our life at a point where we had nowhere else to go and were scared. But, she never treated us like strangers and everyone made us feel loved and like instant family. Even now, Amy and Sam are still my parents.”

Amy and Sam's own daughters, and their foster children, have become a blended family

Growing up with foster children in the home has had a positive impact on Amy's daughters.

“We are one big family and it makes weekends, holidays and special occasions so much fun.

Our daughters treat the older girls as their sisters

"They're the first people they want to speak to after a bad day or if they need advice. The girls love being hands-on big sisters even though they’ve now left home.

“At school, our daughters are known for being super empathetic. They help new children and those with additional needs, they’re understanding. It’s lovely to see their kind, caring and nurturing personalities."

Amy’s birth daughter Lily, aged 9, shared her thoughts on growing up in a fostering family. “I like having a home where’s there’s always someone to play with. My big sisters are the best and I love it when they come back home.”

Amy embraces her role as a foster carer and helping children in care to grow

“Children in care often feel like they deserve nothing. As foster carers, we help them to realise their potential and believe in themselves. We help to show what they can achieve, what they deserve in life, and set the bar for what a family home should feel like."

Then, Amy sees joy in helping children meet their milestones.

“Then we have the absolute joy of celebrating all their achievements along the way, big and small. From helping the little ones reach their skill milestones or learning to ride a bike. All the way to the older ones passing their driving tests or going off to university.

What advice would Amy share with anything thinking of fostering with Essex?

"You should feel reassured that Essex County Council always consider our needs when matching children to us. Our daughters are well supported, they love being involved.

“Some people think foster carers need a special set of skills but you don’t. All children need is consistency and nurture, you have to show up for them.

“In an ideal world there wouldn’t be foster carers, but in the real world foster carers are needed. We have to step up to do our bit, to give these children a loving home and a good start in life.”